June 27, 2003
A Day back in the Office
Getting into the groove at work today took a little longer than usual, not because I've been working from home most of this week, but because I find myself thinking about Heidi and baby Caroline a LOT. I know this is pretty normal, but I'm surprised at the number of times I've caught myself thinking about my "girls at home."
It's just amazing how quickly I fell in love with Heidi, and how we are now filled with even more love to share with our daughter. It's amazing being a parent.
In other news, Andy and Christine Schwarz had a baby girl yesterday. Congratulations!
June 24, 2003
Day five
So far, the life of a new parent has been pretty fun, interesting, and a wee bit challenging, but in a good way. How so?
Well, something like this:
Changing diapers? No problem.
Waking every couple hours during the night to assist (as much as possible) with feeding, changing, burping? No problem.
Wading through mounds of unfolded baby clothes and recently acquired toys on the way to the kitchen for a bite to eat? No problem.
Mowing the lawn without stopping every 50 steps to chat with neighbors about beautiful, little, Caroline? No problem. 3.5 hours to do the lawn is not a problem.
Working with the dog (Hershey) so she learns that when the baby cries, it's really OK, and we're just changing the diaper? Challenging.
Writing "thank you" notes to all the people who have sent and dropped off the wonderful clothes, books, toys, and assorted baby things? No problem, but challenging to find time to insert a coherent thought into a card.
So far, I absolutely love being a dad. I know, it's been only five days, and this is just the beginning. That's right. It's just the beginning. But so far, it's great, enlightening, uplifting, challenging, and off-the-scale fun. I cannot describe the joy I feel in my heart when I hold Caroline, or see Heidi holding her.
It's completely reaffirmed my constant love for Heidi. Her wonderful outlook, both for our child and for us as a family, is awe inspiring. We each have high hopes, not only for our daughter, but for ourselves as well. It's humbling to know that this little life is in our hands, to raise, educate, and prepare.
So, as I get ready to change the diaper of my little five-day-old darling, I am reminded of a song...
"Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry 'bout what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go"
I'm learning.. and loving it!
June 19, 2003
Caroline Lauren Kelly
Today our daughter, Caroline Lauren Kelly, was born. It's beyond me right now to explain the rush of emotion, save to say that Heidi was simply amazing, and our daughter is indescribably beautiful.
June 13, 2003
Mother Nature and Father Time
Today is a beautiful day, and I have, so far, taken advantage of it only by riding my motorcycle to work this morning. The weather man says it's supposed to be 80 and sunny today, tomorrow, and, well, for the next few days. So I should not be thinking of playing hookey, should I?
Well, I've been acutely aware of the weather and the passing time recently (still waiting for the baby!) mainly watching in amazement as the roses bloom in our backyard and the newly planted grass grows where the tall pine trees used to stand. Watching the grass grow? No, not really, but it's amazing how much patience I am acquiring by "working the soil" a little bit.
I've always loved working outdoors, especially when it comes to landscaping or running a chainsaw. But this is different somehow, and I'm glad for it. As a web developer/editor/project manager, everything seems to be now!now!now! and I've let that seep into every part of my life.
Hang on, you say, don't get all "positive affirmation on me." Naw, it's just me telling myself to slow down a little bit. Remember to stop and smell the roses. Take time to feel the grass between my toes. Stop simply noticing and start enjoying.
I'm working on it.
June 11, 2003
The Random Insult Generator
For anyone is in need of an insult (for yourself or for someone else) The Random Insult Generator may be for you!
Funny Quote
Last year I took a software training class, during which the trainer made this wonderful, ironic statement in response to a class comment that the software did not seem terribly easy for new users:
"Now that I've been using it for a while, it's very intuitive!"
Needless to say, I wrote it down. Today I re-read it and still laugh at it.
June 10, 2003
Still waiting
After nearly a week of heart-pounding, anxious anticipation that the baby would be here sooner than expected, Heidi found out today that she is still pretty much at 3cm. The doctor was surprised to see Heidi in for her 38+ week checkup, actually saying that she fully expected Heidi to have delivered the baby by now. Well, needless to say, it still could, and will be any day now. The actual "due date" is June 20th, not that we can look at our baby like a library book.
The doctor also said that the baby looks health, and that he/she (we still don't know, and will not know until the birth) will probably be a 7+ pound baby. Pretty normal, and nothing "out of the ordinary" is expected.
Heidi is now feeling some stronger contractions (what she classifies as bad cramps) but still only sporadically. She is very eager to have the baby now, and spent a good amount of time in the last few days cleaning the house. I would not classify it as "nesting" but just a general feeling that things could stand to be picked up.
I of course, have the absolutely absurd notion that the baby will care if the lawn looks just right. I've pretty much done my nesting, what with the whirlwind of painting and cleaning I did a few weeks back. The nursery still looks pretty much the same, although there is now more furniture in the room, which required moving most of the existing stuff around... for like the fourth or fifth time.
Since we had some time and a little "fun money" we've planted a rose garden in the back yard where the previous owners had some different roses growing. I, unfortunately, killed those delicate little plants, so we planted some stouter species for our own enjoyment. A couple photos for your viewing pleasure: Photo 1 and Photo 2.
Hopefully I'll have baby's been born news soon. Until then, Heidi and I are doing our best to bank up a little sleep... when I'm not playing SSX Tricky on the X-Box with Andy. Oh, and reading Dave Barry books. I've recently reread several, including Babies and Other Hazards of Sex: How to Make a Tiny Person in Only 9 Months With Tools You Probably Have Around the Home. A good natured, fun read. And laughter of that magnitude is GREAT exercise.
June 06, 2003
Anxiously Waiting
Earlier this week, Heidi found out that she had already begun dialating in preparation for childbirth. This of course, started a frenzy of activity and discussion between us, a decision to request that an upcoming baby shower be slightly postponed, and increasing anticipation of the birth of our first child.
We've got our bags packed and in the front hall. We've got phone numbers of who to call if I'm at work and Heidi needs a ride to the hospital. We have a dog that is going absolutely ballistic because of all the new stuff in the house.
I have to say, I'm still excited, nervous, and feel totally unprepared for this baby (just because I don't really know what's coming), but I want it to be born more than anything.
There's really nothing left to paint in the house. We've got bales of second-hand baby clothes (Heidi is the garage sale queen) washed, Oxy-Cleaned, folded and awaiting a little body to be put in them. It pretty much comes down to waiting.
Not that the baby is actually due until June 19th or 20th, but now that the doctor says it has "begun" we've been counting the minutes as they pass. Heidi even said she "talked to the baby last night," saying, what I can only assume are words of comfort and encouragement... something like, "OK, really, it's OK if you want to be born now! Really!"
Everyone at work who has told me of their own experience with their kids has warned me to prepare for the soon-to-be-a-reality fatigue "unlike anything experienced before" from lack of sleep. I can't say that I'm looking forward to sleep deprivation, if it really does happen, but I am looking forward to picking up the baby, seeing the tiny little hands and feet, looking into his/her eyes and being filled with the joy that only comes from being a parent.